Beat The Blerch - 10k/half/full marathon
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What is this?

Beat The Blerch is a 10k, half marathon, and full marathon inspired by this comic about running.
Organized by The Oatmeal, these races are a way for you to figuratively (and literally) Beat The Blerch.

Highlights of the Races

  • Matthew Inman, AKA The Oatmeal, will be running and attending each race.
  • Every participant gets a “I Beat The Blerch in 2015” tech shirt and medal. Please note that Sacramento 5k runners get no medal.
  • There will be large quantities of cupcakes at every aid station, in addition to Nutella and magical grape beverages.
  • Race photos are FREE.
  • Ridiculously awesome goodie bag stuffed with Blerch surprises.
  • A portion of the proceeds go to charity.
  • There will be actual Blerchs in fat-suits chasing you throughout the race.

The Races

Carnation, WA


September 12th, 2015

Registration closed!

Event Details


September 13th, 2015

Registration closed!

>Event Details

Morristown, NJ


September 26th, 2015

Registration closed!

Event Details

Sacramento, CA


November 14th, 2015

Registration closed

Event Details

Virtual Race

We'll ship you a race kit!

September 12th, 2015

Virtual Registration closed!

Virtual Kit Details
The Races
Sponsored by Zappos
Carnation, WA

September 12th and 13th, 2015

Both days: 10k / Half / Full marathon

Our Carnation, Washington race will take place in a quaint little town located about 35 minutes outside of Seattle. Here's a map.

It begins at King County’s Tolt MacDonald Park, and it's a beautiful flat, out-and-back course that winds its way through evergreen, mossy forests along the Snoqualmie valley trail. Near the starting line of the race are strawberry farms and pumpkin patches, which offer guided tours in case you’re still up for a bit of walking after the race.

Carnation race results: Click here
Carnation photos (Saturday): CLICK HERE
Carnation photos (Sunday): CLICK HERE

Morristown, NJ

September 26th 2015

10k / Half / Full marathon

Located one hour from NYC, our Morristown race will wind through the historic Lewis Morris Park. Here's a map.

All participants will run on stunning trails that meander through the 1,000 acre park and along Whippany River. The half and full marathoners will continue on country roads and loop back through Lewis Morris Park.

Morristown race results: Click here
Morristown photos: CLICK HERE

Sacramento, CA

November 14th, 2015

5k / 10k / Half / Full marathon

Registration closed!

Our California run takes place in historical Sacramento. Here's a map.

This course is a meandering loop beginning at Raley Field going across the striking Tower Bridge over the Sacramento River, the largest river in California. From there you’ll travel down the tree-lined Capital Mall Boulevard. Full and half marathoners will then run along the Sacramento River and American River finishing at Raley Field.

Sacramento race results: Click here
Sacramento photos: Click here

Virtual Race Kits

Can't travel or get into a race? Run it virtually!

A virtual race is a race that you run on your own time and in the location of your choice.

When you order a virtual race kit, we'll send you a race shirt, medal, bib, stickers, Blerch sweatband, fridge magnet, Blerch stress ball, and other delicious little Blerchy surprises.

Registration closed!

The Book

In addition to running the race, Matthew Inman will be hanging out while signing copies of his latest book: The terrible and wonderful reasons why I run long distances.

The book contains over 140 pages of comics, stories, and illustrated hilarity about running, eating, and blerching.
Each copy also includes a pair of Blerch race stickers.

Order: Amazon

0.0 Blerch race sticker

Over 140 pages of comics about running, eating, and blerching.


We are currently seeking sponsors for the race (I’m looking at you, Nutella). If you’re interested, please contact us.


We need volunteers! If you want to participate in the race but don’t want to run, you can always help out by volunteering!

Morristown, NJ
To volunteer sign up here.

Sacramento, CA
To volunteer sign up here.

If you're a local running group or business and you wish to volunteer, please shoot us an email:


  • How do I register? Registration dates are listed above!
  • How much is each race? 5K: Sacramento only, $35 (no medal)
    10K: $55
    1/2: $80
    Full: $110
  • Are you going to add a virtual race option? Yes, this will enable you to order a shirt, bib, goodie bag, and medal and run the race on your own time. This is intended for those who couldn't get registered in time. Here's a link (sold out).
  • Are you looking to expand to other cities? Yes, we'll add more cities in 2016. In the meantime, feel free to let us know on Facebook or Twitter which cities you'd like us to expand to.
  • What's included with my registration? Race registration comes with entry into the race, a "I Beat The Blerch" race/tech shirt and medal, and goodie bag full of stickers and Blerchy surprises.
  • Are refunds available? Sorry, no refunds will be given for any reason.
  • Can I transfer my registration to another person? Transferring your registration to another person is allowed ($10 transfer fee) as long as this is done at least 14 days prior to the race.
  • Can I swap days? If there's space available, we can try to swap your days around. If you plan on swapping days, please let us know so we can get your registration changed.
  • Is there a cutoff time? Sacramento has a six hour cutoff. The other races have a seven hour cutoff.
  • What's the difference between the Saturday and Sunday races? Both races will be identical.
  • Is Matthew Inman (The Oatmeal) running both days? Yes.
  • Will you be selling books at the event? Yes, the book will be available for purchase during packet pickup the day before, and Matthew Inman will be there if you want it signed.
  • Can I wear a costume? Yes, please.
  • Will there really be cake and Nutella? Yes, lots. Eat (and vomit) at your own risk.
  • Will the race be chip-timed? Yes.
  • Can I register day-of-race? No. You have to pre-register.
  • Why didn't the melons get married? BECAUSE THEY CANTALOUPE.



2015 Results & Photos


2015 Saturday Photos.
2015 Sunday Photos. (all photos are free for all runners)
2015 Carnation results.


2015 Photos. (all photos are free for all runners)
2015 Morristown results.


2015 Photos
2015 Sacramento results.

2014 Results & Photos

2014 Photos. (all photos are free for all runners)
2014 Results.